I Woke Up Sick of Myself Today
How to Get Over Stinking Thinking
Me at 5:55 a.m., my hoodie, ready to write and get over my stinking thinking.
I doubt I’m the only one who woke up sick of himself. Don’t get me wrong. This article isn’t about seeking your approval, or self-pity. It’s about the are of getting over our stinking thinking.
My stinking thinking started at a young age. Perhaps it’s the inheritance of the sins of my forefathers. Or maybe it’s a condition of falling into a world gone insane. But the truth is that every time I think the world has lost it’s way, I remember from my study of history it’s always been this way.
Despite my self-view right now, I’m already feeling better as I listen to Christian rappers rap, and process each word as it flows onto the screen. Therein lies the beauty of practicing any art. It’s a way to go above and beyond the times we feel down, out, and low.
More than anything else, I feel immense gratitude for the gift of life. If you’ve been through hell and back, and found a higher track to run on, you might know my best friend; contentment.
Feeling Sickness
It’s a reminder to shift gears into a better mode of seeing myself and the many blessings of the world we live in. Feeling sick, lonely, down, and out is the gateway to finding ways to be of service to others.
I sin when I fall prey to vice. Vices and sins are conjoined twins. By the way, most of us have a twisted view of sin. Here’s the etymology of the word:
Vices Are the Opposite of Virtue
They are the path to creating a living hell while on Earth. They are almost identical to the Seven Deadly Sins found in every Bible.
Here’s a quick refresher on the Eight Vices:
Gluttony. I’m sick of not being enough, making enough, winning enough, and so on. The bottom line is God loves us all, and we are enough. The heck with being a glutton. When we are enough, we have enough, including all the stuff we don’t need.
Fornication (lust). Ah, this one is a doozy for many of us. But for me, I’m leaning more into the ways of the monks I study. Lust has lost it’s luster for me. Younger folks, beware the treachery of lust.
Avarice (greed, covetousness). Greed used to chase me like a relentless demon. It still shows up once in a while, but age brings wisdom if we let it. Greed is a slippery slope. If you’re falling on it, get off the slide.
Anger. I’m a recovering fearful, control freak. Fear is the hotbed of anger, and anger used to consume me until I lost all fear of death, and being poor of spirit. The suggestions later in the article are how I got over fear and anger.
Sadness. I get sad sometimes, but not like the old days when I drank and drugged. When I discovered the power of contentment, I can sit with sadness knowing it will move on faster than the cravings that used to consume me. (If you drink alcohol beware that it’s a legalized depressant. It’s toxic waste to me.)
Despondency (sloth, acedia). I don’t find myself despondent as in years past. But it’s easy to let despondency consume us when we are attached to outcomes, and not getting what we think we want, which is a delusion that can take us to terrible places. Sloth is the fiend that feeds all sorts of spiritual and bodily disease.
Vainglory (boastfulness, cenodoxia). Humility is the way to deal with vainglory. Vanity is the modern-day word for this. One way to know I’m less vain is I’m okay with the way my face sometimes appears like it’s beef jerky. Again, acceptance of what is becomes the path to dismiss vanity.
Pride. Oh how I used to be proud of my trophies or praise from others. One way I fall prey to pride is thinking I’m smart or know more than others. I’m not. In fact, the more I know about the world and how heaven works, I become less of me and more of Him; the power most of us call God.
Now that you know more about the vices, or “passions” as they’re called in Christian Orthodoxy, they are essentially identical to Their purpose is to teach us to rise above the darkness in our fallen realm, and to grow closer to the Living Light that is within us all.
Healthy Ways to Get Over Stinking Thinking
First, we must challenge our negative thinking. We’re the only animal that thinks poorly of itself. We’ve been given the gift of life, self-awareness, and God-awareness unless one is an atheist or agnostic. Negative thinking isn’t real when we replace it with loving thoughts.
The next way to shift gears is to become more mindful or self-aware of how judging we can be of ourselves, the neighbors, and the seeming jerk who cuts us off in traffic, or drives like a dolp in the fast lane.
Positive affirmations are powerful tools for overriding stinking thinking. For example, as soon as I began to observe my stinking thinking upon waking up, I got into reading spiritual works, the Bible, and saying to myself, “Dude, get over yourself. Go write, process this lame thoughts, and be of service to someone else.”
Journaling is another way to process our thoughts, good, bad, and indifferent as they may be. If you want a great book on the neuroscience of journaling, grab a copy of Switch On Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking, and Health by Caroline Leaf. I’ve journaled since 1981, and like journaling, being a writer helps me process thoughts.
Choose positive thoughts, which, like affirmations, reprogram the stinking thinking. Lean into gratitude and your attitude will quickly change. “God, thank you for my many blessings. Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." That’s the serenity prayer, and it’s a Godsend.
One other way to get over our stinking thinking is to remember we are not our faces, emotions, or anything else we think we are from an egoic standpoint. We are human beings with souls given the gift of life, and a sometimes cold, damp, dark classroom called the school of life.
In closing, we are not our thoughts even if we think so. Go light up the day, and see what you can do to serve someone else. Because if you think you’re having a bad day, or you’re a bad person, use your self-awareness to rise above the seeming suckiness of life.
Focus on being love! Be of service in your unique ways. It’s the fastest way to feel better, like I do, now.
I write about the art of human transformation, transcending suffering, and overcoming life’s challenges with transcendent unconditional love and forgiveness. You can learn more about my strategic coaching work at www.CliffordJones.com.