How to Find and Sustain the Flow State: The Ultimate and Sustainable High
Hint: We had it as children before life happened, and we lost it
Image credit, author - Granddaughter Penelope
We are all born in a state of flow, and then we lose it. Look at a child like my granddaughter, Penelope. She is completely absorbed in play, fully present and free of self-consciousness. That natural state of awareness is our birthright.
Over time, children begin to experience self-conscious emotions, such as embarrassment, shame, and pride, which reflect a growing awareness of how others perceive them. As noted in developmental psychology, these emotional shifts often become more pronounced in early childhood (around ages 6–8), when the mirror of awareness becomes smeared by expectations, comparisons, and fear.
Reflect on your early childhood and try to recall the state of innocence and joy that existed before life began to take its toll, as it did for me and all of us. For much of my formative years and adult life, I lived in a state of clouded confusion driven by ego. At my worst times, stress, anxiety, fear, and anger weighed me down.
I reached for alcohol and other substances to numb the pain, to find some relief. They worked for a little while, but the morning always came, and with it more regret. What I didn’t understand then was that the state I was chasing outside myself was already inside me. I didn’t need to manufacture it. I needed to remember it.
The Psychology of Flow State
Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi studied this state in the 1970s and coined the term "flow." He interviewed artists, musicians, athletes, and people from all walks of life who described moments when time seemed to disappear, awareness and action merged, and effort became effortless: a state of flow that I describe as the ultimate high.
Csikszentmihalyi called it flow because people said it felt like being carried by a current. In his book Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience, he explains that this state is not an accident. It arises when our skills meet the right level of challenge, when distractions fall away, and when the activity itself holds meaning.²
I’ve experienced a state of flow at various times throughout my adult life, whether playing tennis, pickleball, golf, hiking, or engaging in activities such as photography, painting, and writing. However, I’ve wondered for decades how to find something more sustainable. A state of mind that I could carry with me through the day.
Over the past several months, I’ve discovered it. At first, I wondered if I could actually sustain it and live a normal life. And the answer is yes. I’m sustaining it pretty much everywhere I go, and when I feel fear, self-doubt, frustration, or my egoic judging mind takes the reins, I default to conscious breathing and various prayers or sayings, including “Here, now.”
As a result, I describe it as a sustainable state of serenity that compels me to realize I’ve been looking for this kind of high my entire life. And I didn’t need to move to India or Tibet and move into a monastery to find it. It’s been within me the whole time, but living life makes it hard to remember until I did the work and developed a process I could teach to others.
The Spiritual Paths to Flow
Yet flow is more than psychology. It is the essence of what spiritual traditions have been pointing to for centuries. In Tibetan Buddhism, Dzogchen teaches that our true nature is inherently perfect, a natural state of awareness known as rigpa. Chögyal Namkhai Norbu explained it with the image of a mirror in his book, The Self-Perfected State.
The mirror never smiles first. The mirror is a metaphor for our state of consciousness. It reflects whatever appears before it, but it remains clear. Our awareness is the same. Thoughts and emotions come and go, but the awareness that underlies them remains constant. Flow is living from that recognition.
Taoism calls this Wu wei, or effortless action, the art of moving with the current of life rather than against it. Christians read in Matthew 18:3-4 something similar:
“And he said: ‘Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.’”
I’m not a theologian, but I’ve studied all the world's religions and take to heart the truth, way, and life of Jesus. It’s not about religion unless we make it so. The bottom line is that a child receives life with trust, humility, and an open mind.
The same wisdom runs through the world’s great traditions for those willing to see it. In Yoga, the ancient Hindu discipline that unites body, mind, and spirit, it is called Samadhi, a state of deep absorption in which the separation between subject and object dissolves.
Different Ways to the Same Thing: Transformation
Different paths, different words, yet the same universal principle that anyone willing to do the inner work can find and accept. Through my own journey of sobriety and decades of study, I came to see flow as both universal and deeply personal.
Out of that journey, I distilled a process I call the Clarity S.H.I.F.T. Method®. It begins with self-awareness (S), the simple but profound act of paying attention to what is happening inside you. Noticing your thoughts, emotions, and the tension or ease in your body opens the doorway. Once you are aware, you can no longer live entirely on autopilot.
From awareness grows a higher understanding (H). As you step back, patterns become clearer. You begin to see that your struggles are not random but connected to deeper causes and choices. Awareness provides information, but understanding gives it meaning.
Because you understand more, introspection (I) naturally follows. You become willing to look deeper and ask the harder questions: What is driving me? What story am I believing? What am I afraid to face? This honest reflection brings hidden obstacles into the light, and with light, they begin to lose their power.
Because you have faced the truth within, focused intention (F) becomes possible. Instead of scattering attention on distractions or old habits, you make a deliberate choice to align your energy with what matters most. Intention is what takes insight and turns it into action, like a rudder guiding a boat with the current rather than against it.
And when we sustain the intention for flow, serenity, unconditional love, forgiveness, and acceptance, transformation (T) unfolds. We return to the childlike state we all had until life pounded it out of us, and we forgot.
Flow and transformation rarely happen in a single moment, but rather gradually. Instead of waiting for a burning bush experience, become a willing student and practice finding your flow state. The grip of anxiety loosens. Fear quiets. Anger softens. In their place comes presence, clarity, and a flow that no longer feels accidental. It becomes a natural way of being.
Discovering the Middle Way to Live and Work
Here’s a saying, a mantra, that I came up with to describe my philosophy and way of being at this stage of my life. The phrase “Middle Way” has deep roots in the teachings of the Buddha, who described the Middle Way as the path between extremes of indulgence and denial.
Instead of chasing pleasure or punishing the body, the Buddha taught the importance of balance, moderation, and wisdom. In many ways, this principle has also been echoed in other traditions. In Christianity, for example, we see it in the call to live with temperance and humility. In Taoism, it’s reflected in harmony with the Tao. In modern psychology, we recognize balance as a key to resilience and sustainable well-being.
“Not too high, not too low. Not too left, not too right. The middle way is the way to go. Therein lies the shift.”
My process does not create something new. The Clarity S.H.I.F.T. Method® uncovers what was always there. It is the same truth Dzogchen expresses when it says there is nothing to add and nothing to take away. The sky is always present, no matter what clouds pass through. Awareness is always present, regardless of the thoughts or emotions that arise.
Today, I live in the state of sustainable flow that I once tried to find in a bottle or bag of weed. Substances dulled my edges, but flow sharpens them. Substances numbed my pain, but flow integrates it. Substances disconnected me, but flow connects me to myself, to others, and to the God of my humble and limited understanding.
Every tradition points back to the same truth. Awareness itself is perfect. We are born in it, we lose it, and we can learn to return. Flow is not escape. It is life aligned. It is the ultimate and sustainable high, and it’s a great place to be, considering the many challenges we face on earth.
Sharing the Love, Teaching the Clarity S.H.I.F.T. Method®
Now that you know more about my story and process for shifting into a flow state, you can understand why I love sharing and teaching my process. The shift isn’t just my story, it’s our shared human story.
We are all born in flow, we lose it, and we can find our way back. What I’ve discovered is not a secret reserved for mystics, monks, or psychologists. It is available to anyone willing to pause, to look within, and to walk the path of awareness.
Flow is not escape. Flow is life aligned. And when you live from that place, the sustainable high you’ve been searching for turns out to be the one that has been within you all along.
I'm an author, mentor, and facilitator. I help founders, executives, and professionals overcome career burnout, stress, social anxiety, and lack of engagement. Discover my unique, five-step method at www.CliffordJones.com.