How Being an ADHD-Power Salesman Eventually Crushed Me
The hidden cost of being a sales warrior
A cartoon of me, a sales dog who sells business consulting services. Image credit to me and ChatGPT.
Let me tell you a story most entrepreneurs don’t share. It’s a story about learning what being an ADHD-powered sales dog meant for me.
Trauma. The trauma of being a sales warrior is a subject I’ve never known about, and I’ve been in sales for forty-two years. And that doesn’t count talking my mom and dad into 10,000 things I wanted or needed as a kid.
In short, I’ve been in sales my entire life. I was born to sell, which to me, means three things:
Be curious and care about helping people get what they want.
Help them get it.
Make a fair profit.
Welcome to the life of a salesman. That’s my life since I hustled my first lawn mowing gig.
Smile and Dial, or Die
If I didn’t “smile and dial” the telephone long and well enough, I feared the worst: failure, inability to feed my family, or keeping a roof over our heads. Not being able to meet our basic human needs is one of the most tragic sources of trauma known to humanity.
But I didn’t know squat about any of this stuff until I dialed so hard and long, for over two decades, before I imploded much like a rock star with a shadow that consumed the light.
What I learned is that fear of failure begets failure. And the mental, emotional, and spiritual tsunami that shipwrecks our souls can be one of the best things that happens to career sales professionals who have a tough time dealing with rejection.
When Sales Becomes Survival
Rejection hurts. But for people like me with ADHD, it hits harder than most realize.
There’s a name for this: Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD). It’s a condition tied to ADHD where even small rejections or perceived criticism trigger intense emotional pain—shame, sadness, even rage.
Psychiatrist Dr. William Dodson explains:
“RSD is an intense reaction to the perception—real or imagined—of being rejected, teased, or criticized. It can cause severe emotional pain that’s difficult to control.” (ADDitude Magazine, 2017)
I didn’t learn that in any sales training.
The Invisible Burden
My first real sales job was in 1983, fresh out of college, working for a luxury hotel in downtown L.A. My job was to knock on doors, get meetings, and fill rooms.
Over the years, I climbed many office towers, knocked on many doors, and dialed the phone more than most.
I received advanced sales training, sold, and trained others, but nobody taught me how to handle the emotional toll of rejection, especially when you’re building your own business.
As a business owner, it wasn’t just about closing deals. It was about survival, feeding my family, paying the bills, staying afloat. And when rejection showed up, it didn’t just sting.
It crushed me.
I didn’t know I had ADHD. I didn’t understand why I felt every “no” like a gut punch. I just knew I was burning out.
The Business of Melting Down
Sales is hard. My approach has always been “soft selling in a hard world.” It’s about taking a consultative approach to helping prospects become clients.
Business development is brutal for many reasons. It’s waking up daily, putting your value into the world, and getting ignored, brushed off, or ghosted.
If you’re wired like me—with a fast brain, big heart, and a mountain of passion—you start wondering: Is it just me? Am I broken?
To cope, I drank every night. The goal was always to take the edge off. Then a little more.
Eventually, I burned out. My breakdown hit mentally, physically, spiritually, and financially, precisely in that order.
That was my “near-death” moment. The good news is that I had a moment of clarity, and in that instant, I decided to get help and shift into a higher gear.
How I Bounced Back
Sitting in my car one night after confronting a tsunami of self-loathing, I hit a wall. “I can’t do this anymore,” I thought. But then another voice whispered, “What if this is your gift, not your burden?”
That voice saved me. I started reading as many psychology books as I could afford. I learned something important: ADHD isn’t just a disorder. It’s a superpower when you know how to work with it.
It’s a superpower called purpose. As sales professionals, we can sell with the best of the best when we feel inspired by a higher meaning, such as helping others.
We become the shining stars and top performers. We’ll never run out of work because we’ll never run short of people to serve.
What Changed Everything
I got help. I read the science. I did the work. I’m still doing it now. There’s no endgame here. It’s about loving the walk.
That’s how I learned this stuff about myself. I’m ADHD, and I have a superpower. If you’re like me, now you know more about yourself.
I rebuilt my habits and mindset. So can you.
Here’s what helped me the most:
1. Know What You're Dealing With
Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria is real. Knowing it gave me compassion for myself. I stopped thinking I was just “too emotional.” I started managing my triggers.
2. Redefine Success
I stopped judging myself by results. Instead, I measured activity: how many calls I made, how many follow-ups I sent. I focused on the process, not the outcome.
3. Protect Your Prime Time
My brain works best in the morning. So I built my schedule around it. I did the hard things early—before self-doubt could creep in.
4. Build a Resilience Routine
I started my day with breathwork, spiritual reading, journaling, or a walk. These rituals grounded me before the day hit back. We build clarity, confidence, and resilience in the quiet moments, not the chaos.
5. Stack Small Wins
When I felt stuck, I’d create a win. Just one follow-up. One DM. One honest post. Action shifted my mood and reminded me I wasn’t helpless.
6. Feel It, Then Move
I stopped pretending rejection didn’t hurt. I let myself feel it, but I didn’t camp there. I moved the emotion through my body and kept going.
7. Serve, Don’t Sell
I changed my mindset. Instead of trying to close, I started trying to help. That shift—from performance to purpose—helped me lead with love, not fear.
From Breakdown to Breakthrough
I still get rejected, but now I see it differently. It’s not a sign that I’m not enough. It’s part of the path.
I wish someone had told me all this when I was younger: You are not broken. You need better tools. And more support.
If you're in sales and you’ve got ADHD, you’re not weak. You're wired differently. You’re probably among the most innovative, driven, and visionary people in the room.
But you need structure, perspective, and the ability to stop seeing rejection as punishment and start seeing it as tuition.
Never Give Up
I almost gave up. But I didn’t. And now, I get to help others like you build something real, without letting rejection break you.
If you remember nothing else from my story, know that the business of life gets better with age if we believe so, and we’re willing to do the work every day.
I help conscious founders, thought leaders, and trusted advisors build brand equity, simplify marketing, and accelerate sales. Get your free Brand Equity Playbook™ Quick-Start Guide at www.CliffordJones.com.